i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
My bed smells like the plague
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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