do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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