I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
