no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
