one two three fourrrrnication!
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
and you fell through a lawn chair
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
