my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
