Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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