that's an acceptable place to lick
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
