White coat. Heels.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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