we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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