Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
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Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
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My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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