Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
