The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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