I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
It's a yes or no question.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!