You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize