Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
that may or may not have been my penis.
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