my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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