whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
