it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
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