As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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