so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I'm always down for nudity.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
