tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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