You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
