Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
