So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
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You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize