I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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