Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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