we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
