My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
