at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Randomize