You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
