1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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