My first STD was from a foam party
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
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