The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize