I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm like, not good at living.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
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