you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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