I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
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