Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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