i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize