Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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