yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize