the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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