Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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