I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
two words...techno handjob
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
