We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Randomize
