There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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