i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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