Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my poor anus
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize