Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
