can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
