i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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